I travel the same route to work every day, usually bleary eyed, a bit disheveled, and almost always running 30 to 45 minutes late.

The only shining part to my morning commute? Seeing "Carpet Carl, the Living Billboard." That's right, the fearless leader of a local carpet company gets into a boom lift every morning, and stands precisely under the arrow on the giant-ass billboard that says "Carpet Carl."

You can't make this stuff up.

In the noble words of Forrest Gump, "That's all I'm gonna say about that."